A while ago, I decided to jump in and start taking concrete steps towards making some of my goals and dreams come true. No more procrastinating.
It was part of a somewhat therapeutic exercise after some traumatic events had occurred in my life.
I opened an online store to start selling my original Quotes and products with those Quotes, I have semi-started two books, and I created a second blog that I intended to be half the categories of this blog. That way, both blogs would be more streamlined. Lastly, this time of year, I always open my Christmas and Holiday blog for a few months.
On top of all of that, I still have stuff at home going on that needs my attention, energy, and time.
So here I am today, still somewhat traumatized and now entirely overwhelmed by all of this stuff. I’ve stopped walking the talk about how we all need to look after ourselves first and foremost. I’ve even started thinking of myself based on old negative perceptions that I used to have. That kind of thinking is never good.
Overall, I’m a bit of a basket case, so it’s time to stop, drop and reset.
It’s time to listen to what I tell everyone else.
Then I came across this article by Erin McMorrow, who is in a very similar situation and who wrote an article about it. I thought she wrote it much more eloquently than I could right now, so I am shamelessly sharing an excerpt.
Enjoy, and I hope you get something out of it. In the meanwhile forgive me if I’m absent a bit; it just means I’m resting.
“When the sh*t gets crazy, I usually start throwing good things overboard and running around in straight-up fight or flight.
And I’m trying not to be a total hypocrite, as I instruct people on the importance of self-care in the midst of crazy. We all know that the times we need self-care most are the times we are most likely to throw it out the window. And even as a healer and an instructor, I find myself (maddeningly) doing the same damn fight-or-flight thing when I really need self-care. The truth is most of us are not Zen masters, even if we are teachers and healers, and we all need to be reminded. I created this list to remind myself and others of how to come back to center, even in the crazy.
1) Living in crisis mode.
That’s right. Freak out mode. We all do it. Many of us have started to equate it with being a responsible human being (see below). When we operate in fight or flight mode, our bodies remain tense and can’t heal. Instead, we take on emotion and stress that our body tables for later to deal with and store it in our bodies. Breathe. Slow down. Take a walk, even for five minutes. You’ll sleep better, deal better, and feel better.
2) Equating self-care with being irresponsible.
Or the reverse, equating “real life” with stress. This is a no. This is where boundaries and self-value come in handy. When you value yourself, your time, and your well-being, it’s easier to tell the world it can wait a second while you tend to your own garden. It also helps with the side-eye you might get from others who do equate self-care with irresponsibility. Remember, their lack of self-care is not your problem or responsibility. You do you. Being well is a decision we make, not a privilege we have to earn.
3) Waiting for permission.
You don’t need permission to take care of yourself. In fact, nothing you do is up to anyone else. Sometimes taking care of yourself and doing you means doing your work—following your calling. I love this letter, in response to a plea for advice, acceptance, and permission from a young writer…
“But the best possible thing you can do is get your ass down onto the floor. Write so blazingly good that you can’t be framed. Nobody is going to give you permission to write about your vagina, hon. Nobody is going to give you a thing. You have to give it yourself. You have to tell us what you have to say.” ~ Sugar, the rumpus
Permission to strengthen, permission to soften. To go after it or sit down and take a rest. You have your own go ahead. Now do your thing.
4) Mistaking cynicism for practicality.
Bleh. I have a particular level of disdain for this one. I’m all for practicality. I could often use more of it in my life. But to me, cynicism has that pessimistic, if not bitter edge that strikes me as practicality laced with fear. And fear is useful for alerting us—which is good for paying attention. But living in it is not so bueno—and sends us back up to #1—fight or flight crisis mode, which can be paralyzing for body, spirit, and hope.
5) Ignoring your inner voice.
This is a big one. Intuition…the third eye. Sounds a little nutty, perhaps, but is actually pretty simple. Intuition is real, and it gets stronger the more you listen to it. Try running a test for a week, or even a day. Trust your intuition in the decisions you make, and consciously watch the outcomes. Watch the outcomes for the times you go against your intuition. It’s powerful in business, relationships, and life in general. And if you practice with the small decisions, it’ll be easier to figure out what your intuition is saying about bigger decisions.
Thank you, Erin McMorrow – Elephant Journal: 5 Things we are doing that are not serving us.(Link)