I have spent my entire life double checking and scrutinizing myself as I grow, change, and age to make sure I was still the unique person that I am. Specifically that I am 100% not at all like my mother.
My mother and I had what felt like a good loving relationship until I was approximately nine years old. Then she and my father got divorced, and somehow she managed to get divorced from being a mother too. Don’t get me wrong she got full custody but I went from being her daughter to being her hindrance, and then her maid and finally I became the mother figure.
Additionally, my mother suffered from a horrible host of mean spirited and selfish attributes along with a complete lack of insight. This mixture went well with her decades-long alcoholism.
Nope, no pity party here. This is old news, long ago cried and ranted over. Now it’s just a simple fact. Not even the point of this post.
What I really wanted to talk about is that no matter how hard we try (and boy oh boy have I tried) we in some ways cannot escape ending up with some of our mother’s characteristics. Oh yes, I can hear the whaling now. I’m sorry to break it to you, it was terribly hard for me to also accept, but it’s true. (By the way, let’s not tell our daughters about this yet!)
I am so happy for those of you that are gladdened by this news. You guys can stop reading now and go find another post, please. However, I will endeavour to prove it to those of you still in doubt.
- I have actually caught myself saying “I told you so” but in a modern disguised kind of way “Oh yeah, didn’t I mention that?”
- I actually bought a pair of sandals that were more comfortable than the pair that was most stylish!
- I haven’t changed my purse over to a more stylish summer coloured one yet this year! (Thank goodness at least it’s not black)
- Admittedly a lot of Cops and firemen are starting to look kind of young. (In a really good way, though!)
- I seem to constantly be craving sugary things. (my mother once fell and couldn’t get up. After we helped her up we found squished Vachon cakes underneath her)
- My hair is starting to have some grey in it. (I panicked and immediately dyed it!)
- I’ve gained some weight! (My mother was always on the heavy side, whereas I have always worked hard to stay slim.) OMG Does this mean I have to stop eating? LOL
- I have to admit I find slippers cosy in the winter!
- I don’t sleep completely naked anymore! (but don’t get me wrong, I will never wear granny nightgowns)
- I’m turning into a cat lady!
- I’ve become a hypocrite with my kids. (“Oh, all alcohol and drugs are really bad, always just say no.” )
- I’ve also become a master at avoidance. (” When did I lose my virginity? oh, I think Virginia is north of one of those Carolina states.”)
- My newest talent is that of an excellent spy. “Oh, I just love vacuuming under the mattresses!” As I peer under my kid’s beds!
- The cool thing though is that I’ve got one huge thing over my mother. Since I know just about every social media site that exists. No guy that comes near my girls is safe from my scrutiny! So there, Mother beat ya.